So life is good. I feel like I'm finally comfortable...it took 2 months, but hey, at least it's happened. I realized how little time I actually have left here and I'm really trying to make the most of each day. I'm reminded that I only get to live this life once and there aren't redos. This has been one of the most stretching things I've ever done. It hasn't always been easy, but I'm so thankful for this experience. There have been times where I have been so frustrated. I got tired of sticking out everywhere I went and having eyes follow me, comments yelled across the street, and being called mzungu.
There were times when I'd sit and pray and God seemed silent and so far away. This frustration brought me to tears but I continued to pray and through it I was reminded that God is God and that He's present even when I don't feel it. I think that period of frustration caused me to seek Him deeper as I searched for His heart. God showed me how much I truly, desperately need Him every day. I can't imagine life without a relationship with Him. God's ways are higher than ours and so are His thoughts. He's loving, compassionate, and knows us better than we know ourselves. This may all kinda seem like "Duh, Kristen." but I really had to be reminded of that.
“I'm getting into you
Because you got to me,
in a way words can't describe
I'm getting into you
Because I've got to be
You're essential to survive
I'm going to love you with my life
He said, I love you and that's
what you are getting yourself into.”
-Relient K (Getting into You)